Back once again for the Renegade Master
Wow, a lot's happened while I've been away. The pope died. Shame, I liked the pope. The pope smoked dope. He also advocated the plague, he must have been too mashed to put on a condom. Who would've thought anyone would pay attention to a 90 year old virgin?
Camilla Parker Bowles isn't a virgin, and had to repent on TV. I forget why, the Daily Mail probably put her up to it. Slapper, in the eyes of the Lord. But less so than Di.
There's been an election called. Terrible stuff.
So let's play swapsy and solve everyone's problem. The pope marries camilla, thus exonerating her in the eyes of god, and curing the dead pontiff of his virginity. Tony Blair can become pope, which allows to him make crude misjudgements about global politics based on some spurious religious ideas. And Charles can run the country, solving the problem of an ineffectual monarchy and ending the dreadful prospect of a one-month Blairite eulogy in the Daily Mirror. Only Piers Morgan hasn't got a place. He can edit my blog, while I smoke the pope's dope.
Are you thinking what we're thinking?
No. You racist fucking wankers. I mean, how hard can it be to kill a Tory.
Is it just me...
Or is Zoe Williams a better journalist than that column she does. One day she's Orwell, the next she's Gary Bushell. I've read the inside cover of the Weekend Guardian for weeks expecting something good, and it never quite arrives. Her comments are usually good, and I'm sure Zoe used to have a column about top things you wouldn't know if you have a job, and it was brilliant. I seem to remember 'smoking a spliff in the bath' being one of them.
Camilla Parker Bowles isn't a virgin, and had to repent on TV. I forget why, the Daily Mail probably put her up to it. Slapper, in the eyes of the Lord. But less so than Di.
There's been an election called. Terrible stuff.
So let's play swapsy and solve everyone's problem. The pope marries camilla, thus exonerating her in the eyes of god, and curing the dead pontiff of his virginity. Tony Blair can become pope, which allows to him make crude misjudgements about global politics based on some spurious religious ideas. And Charles can run the country, solving the problem of an ineffectual monarchy and ending the dreadful prospect of a one-month Blairite eulogy in the Daily Mirror. Only Piers Morgan hasn't got a place. He can edit my blog, while I smoke the pope's dope.
Are you thinking what we're thinking?
No. You racist fucking wankers. I mean, how hard can it be to kill a Tory.
Is it just me...
Or is Zoe Williams a better journalist than that column she does. One day she's Orwell, the next she's Gary Bushell. I've read the inside cover of the Weekend Guardian for weeks expecting something good, and it never quite arrives. Her comments are usually good, and I'm sure Zoe used to have a column about top things you wouldn't know if you have a job, and it was brilliant. I seem to remember 'smoking a spliff in the bath' being one of them.
posted by Steve Harmison | 2:57 AM
4 Comments:
I fucking hate the weekend guardian magazine. If it wasn't for "The Guide" I wouldn't buy the Guardian on saturdays (much like if it wasn't for the quick crossword I wouldn't buy it on weekdays - it truly is a wank paper).
I hate that "is it just me column", I hate the fucking idiot who writes about men's fashion, I hate "we love each other", grrrrgrgrgrgrgrgr. It's a fucking hideous waste of paper.
Oh, it's good to see you back Iain. When are you next going to be loitering in Brixton? Or are we going to be invited to chez wilson?
yes Iain, is good to have you back in the world of the living. Where on earth have you been? Please don't pretend you have had something more important than blogging to do! Was it a short jail sentence or something?
Yeah, the Guardian weekend is crap. Somewhere on this blog, I also lay into the Guardian Review on Saturdays. The Travel section's no good either, cos I'm skint and it makes depressing reading. That leaves the Sport section, which has some absolute toss on the back page every week- some illiterate writing about watching sport on telly. Not only is he a crap writer, but he's not a comedian either. And Simon Hogarth's a minger. The only thing worth having, as Ed pointed out, is the Guide. Read Jacques Perreti, the only funny thing in the the self-indulgent, £1.20 shit-rag that is the Guardian.
Guy, I've stuck some links in here which explain my activities in photos:
https://www4.indymedia.org.uk/en/2005/04/308108.html
http://www.indymedia.org.uk/en/regions/london/2005/04/308108.html
http://gzzzt.net/corporatepirates/
It was a lot of hard work.
Ed, do come up to Chez Wilson any time. We'll try and sort something out soon, cos there's some nice pubs and stuff near me.
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